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Hey, everyone! Happy Comic Book Wednesday. I hope your week has been fun-filled, productive, and stress-free. I’m preparing to head back home to Roanoke, Virginia this weekend for my brother’s wedding. Exciting. I remember when he was a little baby boy. I’m his older brother, so, of course I did. I’m super-excited for he and his bride-to-be. Big congrats now and much more from the entire family are coming this weekend. The Pennsylvania de Simones travel down south to party with the VA clan. Should be a blast. I can’t wait.

I just killed a spider and feel horrible about it. I had him (I think it was a he) cornered. It was like he wanted it to happen. He just quit running. Poor spider. “Don’t look so mean and next time I’ll spare you.” I just don’t want any little guys biting my Sweet T and hurting the little girl.

So there’s my confession. I hope the “circle of life” doesn’t choose to damage me in any way. I have to fly in a few days and don’t want my sinuses to cause me discomfort anywhere close to the pain I felt in my ears the last time I flew home. I wonder if there are any flying super-heroes with similar sinus problems? Can they fly super-high, or just low enough to where they don’t rupture their eardrums? Please don’t let me murderous action affect my flight. (I’m worried about this at all, if you can’t tell.)

Before I get to my comic book business, one last thing. I know it’s only May, but the Philadelphia Phillies are playing some inspiring baseball. I actually have the game tonight in Detroit streaming behind this document. It’s hard to get pissed at these guys this year. They were projected (Vegas) to win in and around 60 games (81 wins is what you need to finish with a .500 record). They’ve already won 24. I know the “June swoon” is ahead (always happens), but they’re going to win more than 60 games. I think they finish 81-81 if they keep it up (and not lose three in a row this weekend). They couldn’t sneak into the wild card… Could they? Go Phils.

So what’s new with me? Damnit, I’ve been chilling. After five years of non-stop homework, researching, and studying, I’ve taken this month to reflect on how I’ve gotten this far. I haven’t taken a second to appreciate everything. All the good grades and whatnot always felt like it was “never enough” and that there’s still something else I need to take care of. Such is life, I guess. There’s honestly so much I need to take care of at the moment, but I felt like I needed to hit the brakes for a few days.

Now that I’ve realized all I have accomplished, it’s time to act. That’s the plan, at least. I have a few projects jumping around in Word files on my computer. There’s a pretty swank short film I’m currently producing with a few of my friends/mentors down here in sunny Florida. I don’t have a lot of specific info to share at the moment, but as the next months fly by, I’m sure you’ll be reading some of my ramblings about filming “stuff.” Just so I know, which film is better? Predator? Or Commando?

I want to take a quick second to remind all of you that have never listened to the music of The Police to listen to them. Thank you.

Comics! Oh, wow. You guys! I’m all caught up! On everything (I read monthly)! I read Max Landis’ final issue of Superman: American Alien last night. Last time, I briefly mentioned how exciting Superman comics are at the moment. Issue seven of SAA tied a lovely bow onto a beautiful package. This series is the new For All Seasons for the up-and-coming generation of Superman readers. I love, love, loved it. Trust me, I have a ton of thoughts on the Superman titles and will share them in due time. It’s only been a month (7 issues total) of solid Supes canon. If it stays consistent, you will be hearing from me, I assure you.

Let’s see. What else? Oh, yo Sam Humphries’ Citizen Jack! I mentioned this demonizing, political farce last week. The main baddie of CJ goes by the name of Marlinspike. Marlinspike is a killer noun. Never in a million years would I think to name a demon after the tool. If I were to have a cameo in this comic, I would ask Marlinspike if he double-knots his laces. Next, I’d run far away and shut my eyes tight in hopes the demon didn’t get a good look at them.

Have you ever thought that a demon was possibly manipulating one of the U.S. presidential candidates from the last, I don’t know, three elections? Ironic I don’t get it until now that this comic is sort of a, “Wouldn’t it be funny if…” story. But it’s kind of not (for those of you that watch the “news”). Jack Noteworthy is an unforgettable character, I’ll just say that. He’s manipulated by Marlinspike to run for President of the United States. (He doesn’t win or anything.) The book is fantastic, ridiculous, and makes you think. I love that specific trifecta after finishing any story. Read this book and laugh. In all honesty, Citizen Jack kind of sums up how I like to view the world of politics.

[EDITOR’S NOTE: Hello, again. I decided to make my return so I could omit the paragraph this one here now replaces. Matt grabbed his soapbox. I used my delete button during revisions. Simple as that. That comic he was talking about is quite good, though. Go, U, S, and A!]

FUTURE QUEST! Wow. This is the answer to so many “origin questions” I would ask myself as a little boy watching the syndicated Hanna-Barbera action cartoons. Where did Space Ghost come from? Why don’t the Herculoids team up with Space Ghost or the Super Friends? How come I never see the Jonny Quest episode with the “spider cyclopses (or is it cyclopi)?” Well, guess what? Jeff Parker (I think/hope) is about to answer some of them, but possibly all of them, yo. Remember: Super Friends was originally a HB property. Either way, I got the spider-cyclopses in the first issue of FQ. F.E.A.R. brings Bir-r-r-rdman into the fray. Away we go. Stoked up on this series already.

International Iron Man is another refreshing series. Brian Michael Bendis takes us back to what I believe to be Tony Stark’s first heartbreak. I love a love story. Bendis takes one of my favorite dramatic approaches with Tony and his femme fatale. We now know (or you should know) that Tony Stark’s father, Howard, is not his biological father. (They don’t tell you this in the movies, kids. Hence, why reading is way better.) So when we flashback now to Tony’s past, we’re all looking at Howard a bit differently. So who is Stark’s actual father? If this were Batman instead of Stark, Bruce would discover his “father” is actually someone stupid and unnecessary like, shit… I don’t know. Dr. Manhattan, maybe?

Oh, wait…

On that note, let’s look ahead to what I’m sort of referencing.

MY BOOKS THIS WEEK, DOUGH:

DC REBIRTH 1

DOCTOR STRANGE 8

EXTRAORDINARY X-MEN 10

JUSTICE LEAGUE 50

SPIDER-MAN/DEADPOOL 5

SUPERMAN 52

SUPERMAN LOIS AND CLARK 8

STAR WARS 19

TOKYO GHOST 7

Did anyone read the spoilers to DC Rebirth #1? I did AF. After I was finished reading AF, my feelings turned into a “WTF.” I’m spending the $6 or whatever on the book today. Yeah, I know whack shit goes down. What I’m hoping for is a silver lining I can find. Superman is cleaning up right now. He needs to take the point. Wally West returns. It feels right to me. Hopefully the words will enhance my feeling. I have lots of “feelings” about the future of DC Comics. Here’s to hopefully blowing some minds and not “it.” (New 52, ahem.)

“Last Days of Magic,” anyone? Those of you keeping up with Doctor Strange can attest. I wish I could say I’ve been reading Tales of Suspense and “Doc Strizzy” since I was 8 years old, but I haven’t. And neither have you, so don’t act like you’re some “Doc Strange Master Jedi” come November. Just do your research and come at me then. I’m currently grinding on some Strange (and Deathstroke). Who else is going to tell you the movie isn’t “true” to the comics? Duh.

[EDITOR’S NOTE: If you’ve read 30 issues of Doctor Strange, that’s a few more than Matt has ever read of past issues. Don’t listen to him. Although I would suggest reading up because I assure you that by the end of October, Matt will think of himself as a “Doc Strange Master Jedi” which he so cantankerously coined above.]

Bee-tee-dubs, Star Wars: still that fire. Tokyo Ghost: same, but different kind of “same.”

I almost forgot before I run too long, Superman: Lois and Clark concludes today! We’re about to shift gears as the “real” Supes of the DCU makes his presence known to everyone. What are they all going to think once they meet a Superman who has a son? Oh yeah, Clark and Lois Lane (from pre-New 52/post-Crisis) have a little boy, Jon. You can imagine how awesome this kid can be. This is the only good thing that spun out of Convergence. Can’t wait to read all of these books!

With that, I’ll bid you all adieu. Happy reading, everyone! Maybe I’ll see you all next week.

Matt de Simone is a writer, podcast host, and all around cool guy. He enjoys drinking his coffee in the mornings while he watches his magical cat, Tildy, eat her breakfast like the proud lioness she is. T’s picky and loves her food made a certain way. The specialties Matt adds to her meals do not help. This is Matt’s life in Florida.